Fighting the Failure Mindset

Fighting the Failure MindsetLet’s just start with me being honest: I am not qualified to write this blog. As I sit here in my home, I am truly feeling like a failure. My 3-year-old just hit her baby brother. There are random toys all over my living room floor. I just put a Disney movie on so I could get a break and get a blog or two done.

As women we were born to be moms. I have never felt something so strong. But I do have my bad days. I lose my patience. I raise my voice. I spank my child when I say I won’t. I forget to dwell on the positive. Anyone else ever feel this way?

It’s so hard to fight this mindset. From the moment we become a mom, we are faced with expectations. Will you breastfeed? Are you using cloth diapers? Did your baby come into the world naturally? Did you circumcise? Will you bed share? Are you letting your baby cry it out? Are you using rice cereal? When will you start solids? As our kids grow, the questions and lists get longer. None of us can be perfect people, but we are the perfect parent for our children. Your children are yours for a reason.

So when this mindset creeps in, what do we do? Give into it? I admit, some days I do. Some days I just want to be a hermit and hide and think about how my children will probably grow up hating me and thinking about how horrible mommy was. Then, I have a reality check.

My kids have toys–lots of them. So far today, they are wearing clean clothes and have had two meals. We’ve been to the local YMCA where they could play and laugh and learn. So far, this day isn’t a failure. There are so many blessings right in front of us. Why do we miss them? I think it’s because we just forget to look.

Am I a perfect mom? No. I’ve made many mistakes today and I would love to be able to reverse them, but I’m not a failure. I’m here for my kids. I’m here to play, to kiss away the boo-boos, and nurse and rock my little boy. I’m here for comfort. I’m here for protection.

I may not have it right today, and I can assure you tomorrow will bring its own challenges, but I am not a failure. You, mom, you are not a failure. You are a work-in-progress. You are the perfect mom for your children.

You are loved.

You are enough.

Karyn Meyerhoff is a mom of two in Northeast Indiana who loves her kids more than anything.

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One Response to “Fighting the Failure Mindset”

  1. amanda says:

    Thanks for this 🙂